A fine line between Comedy and Blasphemy

It was 17 years ago today that I got sober. Some may know this, others just finding it out. For me, it is a big deal, but I don’t make a big deal about it, as it is a personal thing. No one could tell me before I got sober that I needed to be sober, or if they did, I would not have heard them or would have justified why I was ok. Just as no one could tell me, it is not my place to tell someone else they should be sober, but I can be there for those who are having trouble the same way I was.
Nor do I condemn those who still partake in the alcohol and drugs. If I could safely enjoy it, I would, but I know I can’t. And after 17 years I have not found anything that I need those things to enhance my life. I know I would not have the life I have today, and I would not trade anything for it. I am blessed by my wife, my family and my friends IRL and those I connect with online.
I am truly grateful for my sobriety and for all the people who enhance my life on a daily basis.
Thank You.

Heading “home” is weird. Home is now Austin, but in a way Orange County will always carry the home connotation. I spent over 41 years there, it shaped who I am. Good, bad or indifferent. I always find myself referring to OC as “back home.” is it because I am so used to saying it? That I have never been away from Souther California four this long in one stretch? Is it because there is no Del Taco in Austin?
All those questions run through my head, and you know what? I am a little scared of going back. What if I get real homesick. It was tough enough leaving the first time. Will seeing all the people I love throw me into a tailspin? Honest healthy fears.
What I do know is that moving to Austin was the right thing for Katie and Me. While neither of us had roots in the town, that works to an advantage. I am rooted on the West coast and she is on the East. This way we are planting on even ground and growing together.
So as I sit on the Amtrak heading to CA, I am excited to see my friends and family and the home that made me who I am, as I know Katie is excited to see hers when she goes back to GA in a few weeks, I am also missing Katie and the home we are building for our future.
It seems to me that home is where one feels comfortable and loved for who they are. In those teems, I am blessed to have many homes.

I just finished paying the bills for the month, what a relief. Not that we are struggling, it is just that the paychecks came at odd weeks so I had to pay a couple days late. I don’t think anything gives me more anxiety than not being able to pay bills, or pay them on time. It wasn’t always like that. I used to not stress so much, and not care if I was late. But then again I used to be able to sedate myself into oblivion, or try the “If I just go to sleep, everything will be ok” method. Now I get the “I can’t sleep until I do all I can” method.
Thank God I have Katie to balance me out for whenever I get too stressed out. She keeps the “we do what we can when we can” attitude when it comes to finance.
That said, I am always relieved when I get those things for which I owe up to date and stay current.